Should I buy it for Liam?

There will be no Ho Ho Ho's in this household

Alternately, why my children will not believe in Santa Claus

So I know I'm probably going to piss someone off with this (if anyone reads this blog anymore since it's gone into semi-hibernation. Hello? Is anyone out there?) but after wondering for a few Christmas seasons, I've decided that I'm not going to teach my kids to believe in Santa Claus. And no, it's not because apparently Justin Beiber's mom never let him believe in Santa Claus. Here are the reasons I've come to this conclusion:

1) I never believed in Santa Claus. There's the whole thing that I didn't go to live with my parents until I was two, so I was nearly 3 before Christmas. I'd never heard of Santa Claus up until this point. Maybe I was an overly cynical child, but no amount of coaxing on my sister's or parents's part to get me to believe in Santa.

2) I'm not really sure what's to be gained by believing in Santa. Same with the tooth fairy, but we'll cross that bridge when we get to it. Ultimately, we just learn the adults have lied to us. Again.

3) I just spent 7 hours sewing a platter tutu for Alana. There is NO WAY IN HELL Santa is getting any credit for that. I also spent 3 hours shopping this past Saturday. Does Santa suffer from shin splints? Because I sure do.

4) The biggest reason I decided this was a couple of days ago Di posted on facebook at story of a woman at Kmart paying off people's layaway balances. Someone posted the requisite crap of consumerism, etc at which point another woman wrote:

Kids don't understand materialism and corporate greed. When your son asks you, "Is that all the gifts? Were we naughty this year?" because you could only afford a few inexpensive items, you die a little (a LOT) inside.

I think *I* died a little inside reading that. Right now, Justin has a good job and we're blessed with some semblance of job security for which I'm eternally grateful. Maybe I've being a little pessimistic, but I can imagine all too easily this being a scenario, especially in this economy.

I've been having a little bit of a hard time getting into any sort of Christmas spirit this year. Maybe it a combination of stress, or reading depressing news articles about gendercide, or lack of sunshine, or Republican debates, but I'm not really feeling is this year. The tree finally went up (sans any ornaments until my klepto children grow up) and I finally put the wreath on the door today. But the lights aren't up, dinner is going to be at my brother's, and I'm just too damn tired. Merry Christmas.

Marchin' years apart

A few years ago I knocked off a Stella McCartney Gap kids marching band jacket. Liam was almost three when he wore it (twice!). Now that Alana had fit it, she's going to be wearing that thing everyday to make up for the pain that was sewing it.

Apple tart

I came across blog that the most beautiful apple pie I'd ever seen. Unfortunately the recipe was in BULGARIAN. Through a combination of Google Translate and common sense I came up with this recipe:


Ingredients


Dough:
2/3 c butter, room temperature
2.5 oz (70 g) powdered sugar 
1 tsp vanilla
1 teaspoon grated orange peel 
1 egg
3.5 oz (100 g) finely ground almonds 
5.25 oz (150 g) flour


Cream:
4 tablespoons cake flour (not sure if it has to be cake flour, but the translator said "peak" flour which we guessed as cake)
6 tablespoons granulated sugar 
1 teaspoon grated orange peel 
3 egg yolks
1 2/3 c milk 
1/2 c apple juice (recipe calls for white wine)
1 tsp vanilla 


5-6 apples (we used honey crisps) 


Instructions:


1) Dough: Beat butter with sugar, vanilla and orange peel. Add egg and almond. Add flour gradually until soft dough forms.


2) Grease and flour a tart pan. Spread dough into prepared pan, pressing it evenly and up the sides. Refrigerate while preparing cream.


3) For the cream, into a medium sized saucepan, mix flour with sugar, vanilla and orange peel. Add egg yolks and a little milk. Stir to a smooth, pour the remaining milk and apple juice. Bring cream to a boil and then let it cool. It should be thick. Optionally, you can use some instant vanilla cream or pudding. 


4) With vegetable peeler, make ribbons of apples without removing their skin. Wrap the strips into apple roses. (Martha Stewart has a pretty good tutorial on this).


5) Pour cream over dough and arrange it the apple roses on it.


6) Bake cake in preheated 350 F oven  about 45 minutes, until the dough is baked and apples become golden. Let cake cool completely. Refrigerate.




DON'T be tempted to take this out of the fridge to come to room temperature before serving. The pudding will soften too much and it'll run. Next time I make it, I want to poach the apple strips a little. I think this will make it a little easier to wrap the apples and eat later.

Tart before it went into the oven. You can see the peeled apple in the background

Fresh from the oven.

Next night at Thanksgiving before we served.

Chili crab

This was dinner on Sunday. It was pretty good, but I'm not sure I got the recipe right. I used this recipe. It will be one of the messiest things you'll ever eat.

Cleaning out my camera phone

Kids asleep everywhere: 

Before I finished painting and decorating Liam's room, he was just sleeping on a mattress set. He didn't adapt too well from a toddler bed. He lined up his pillows and then fell asleep hanging off the edge.

Kids's fashion:

Alana's favourite dress. Liam likes to put it on and tease her.

Alana eating:

It's amazing how much of a mess she can make.

We went to a Korean restaurant near our house (one of many). This one was very authentic (menu had no English.) We ordered the kids bi bim pop (rice bowl with stuff on top). Alana was very excited when it came. It was bigger than her head. She made a pretty good dent in it too. 

The kids like their rice pre-wrapped in kim pop.

Playing:

Alana was moping while Liam was at school, so I sent her outside. She meticulously settled herself down in the dirt and started making mud pies.

If it seems like I take more pictures of Alana, it's because she'll hold still for them.

For all my Utah readers

See? It snows here too. Last night's snowfall:

Yay! @#%#$% game.

After two years, I finally beat Katamari Forever. HOLY @#%%$^@#$!!! that was a hard game. Okay, not really, just harder than it's previous versions, and probably more time than I wanted to invest in it while having two kids. But it's done! Bring on the next version! For those of you without a PS2 or PS3 or XBox, here's a version you can play if you have Chrome:

http://kathack.com/

Look what came in the mail for me today

It was only $9 off of etsy (including shipping!) and was supposed to take 2-5 weeks to ship but came in less than a week. I love it! I want to get it engraved with "I Open at the Close" later. Geek alert.

I thought we were done with this @$%$!

It was difficult to wean Alana. She refused to take a bottle and didn't completely wean until she was almost 18 months. So image my surprise on Friday when Alana was being very cuddly, then started pulling on my shirt to latch on. Is this normal? I've heard of toddlers wanting to nurse after younger siblings are born, but that's not the case in this house.

In other news I taught my first ballet class a few weeks ago. One of the reasons we joined the YMCA was that we had access to all the other Ys in the area and a few of them taught adult ballet class. I started to go to one on Saturday. To be honest, I'm not that fond of the teacher because she actually doesn't know that much ballet and is actually a Pilates teacher who has happened to take a few ballet classes. But she had to go to a conference last month and she asked me to substitute for her. I had fun, and the people there told me they'd had fun too, so I'll count it as a win. One girl came back the next week and told me that while she didn't hate me, she wasn't thinking too fondly of me on Sunday night. Yay. The local Y has a job opening for a children's ballet teacher, but I can't take it because of the timing and I don't particularly want to teach kids.

Liam has started preschool officially. I enrolled him into the early education preschool at the local elementary. It's great because they have speech and occupational therapy as part of their curriculum. They also pick up and drop off the kids on the bus outside of the kids's homes, so I don't have to worry about that. Liam actually likes it, which was a huge relief for me. He likes his teacher and after two days of me riding with him on the bus, will now willingly get on the bus without any tears. My little boy's all grown up! And next year Alana will be going too, so I'll have three hours a day, four days a week in an empty house. The thought makes me giddy.

Say it with me

Awwwww.....

"When I'm 80 years old and reading Harry Potter, my family will ask me 'after all this time?' And I'll say 'always'". --Alan Rickman

The Geek Life

Various funny geeky things I've found while internet surfing:

Combining Neil Gaiman AND Doctor Who? I'm in heaven!

For Faith- Zippered Pouch Tutorial

This tutorial is for Faith since I'm not in Utah to show her how to do to it:

Square off fabric. Easiest way to do this is to zig-zag the edges and throw it in the washer then make sure the edges are square to the selvage. Cut fabric to the length of zipper, and plus however big you want the pouch to be. I just took half a fat quarter and folded it in half, so I'll only have the two side seams. This doesn't matter if you have the side seams or all three other sides that need to be sewn together later.

Lay pieces on top of each other and baste edge where zipper will go. Iron seam flat.

Lay the top of the zipper (end where the zip is when it's closed) and sew together like above. It's easier if you move the zip down just a little and sew it about 1/4" down. This will keep the zipper lined up all the way to the top.

Install zipper in whatever technique you like and remove all basting stitches. When turned right side out pouch will look like above (zipper on one edge, other edges will unsewn).

Put right sides together and sew the rest of the seams. Clip the ends of the zipper so they will be less bulky. Overlock or zig-zag edges if you'd like. Turn right side out and press.

Happy 75th birthday, Jim Henson

I'd like to thank you for all the wonderful times you've given my kids.

Because American tv sucks right now

So it's no secret that I watch a lot of British television. And by a lot, I mean most of the stuff I watch was actually on BBC at one time or another. But the biggest problem of living over here in the US means that I often don't get to watch things until a year or two after they've aired in the UK. I've spent a lot of time getting caught up on a bunch of great shows lately through streaming websites of dubious legality, Hulu and Youtube:

QI isn't a new discovery for me. I've been watching it on and off for the past year. It's a panel quiz show that the participants are asked impossibly hard questions they have no chance of getting right, so they get points by being interesting. It is also hosted by the wonderful Stephen Fry and Alan Davies as a permanent guest and is absolutely worth putting up with the crappy 10 minute clips on youtube. I finally caught up on all of them and am in the current 10th (!) series. Some swearing and innuendo, but I recommend it to everyone (note: the language is usually contained in the XL episodes which are about 45 minutes; the 30 minute ones are usually fine.)

 Misfits is show that caught my eye through the Hulu ads. I was confused on the plot from the ads so here's an explanation: It's a bunch of juvenile delinquents that get hit with a freak lightening storm and develop superhero powers. They are, however, the worst superheroes ever. I was pleasantly surprised to find that this show was not only really awesome but really funny. It's like a good version of "Heroes". And despite the producers's obvious efforts to highlight Robert Sheehan, it's actually the amazing Iwan Rheon and charming Lauren Socha that end up being the best characters. All of series one and two (6 episodes each plus one Christmas episode) are available on Hulu, and there is a 8 minute episode called "Vegas, Baby" that takes some hunting on the internet. Series 3 is probably due out in November but will not be shown on Hulu until 2012. As this show contains kind of a lot of sex, violence and A LOT of swearing, I'm not recommending it to everyone. Actually, mostly just Di.

Doctor Who. If you're not already watching Doctor Who, you're beyond my help and I don't know what wrong with you. Safe for everyone except very small children like Liam who might get scared at some of the creepy episodes. Starting to go downhill a little bit but I trust in Steven Moffat to turn it around.

David Mitchell Soapbox isn't really a show-I think they're just podcasts. David Mitchell is one of my favourite writers/actors/panelists on QI. He's such a little funny ball of frustrated energy and his rants are funny. All of these are on Youtube, but don't watch too many in a row or you'll start hating the world more than usual. Or at least I did. Best ones that I've seen so far are "Dear America", "Naming Your Child", and I hate to admit it, "The Merits of Necrophilia".

Would I Lie to You is another of David Mitchell's projects. It's a panel show along the lines of the party game "True or False". The panelists makes statement and the other team has to guess if it's true or a lie. Hosted by my favourite Welshman, Rob Brydon, previously hosted by Angus Deayton, with David Mitchell and the only sometimes funny Lee Mack as team captains. Usually the guests are entertaining with a few really odd ones here and there (Janet Street Porter needs to crawl back to whatever hole she came from). Available on Youtube.

That Mitchell and Webb Look is yet other Mitchell project with longtime comedy partner Robert Webb. Hilarious, offensive and available on Hulu. Innuendo, some violence, and lots of swearing. 

Never Mind the Buzzcocks is a music panel show. It's been on for a VERY long time. Used to be hosted by the hilarious Simon Amstell and has Phill Jupitus and Noel Fielding as team captains. I haven't watched a whole lot of these, but it usually cheers me right up. Funny episodes include: Stephen Fry, Alan Davies, David Tennant (hosting the Doctor Who episode), John Barrowman (who threatens a "Gay off" with Simon), and surprisingly Josh Groban with Martin Freeman (see Sherlock). The only not funny one that I've watched was the one with Amy Winehouse, which somehow I managed to watch the week after she died. Ummmm, so yeah. On Youtube but lots of swearing. 

Whites is a restaurant drama/comedy that starts Alan Davies (see QI). Also a find on Hulu, it's worth watching just to see the genius of Davies, but sometimes painful to get through. Funny in a laidback, awkward sort of way. Cancelled after one series of 6 episodes. Lots of swearing.

Best for last is Sherlock. A modern take on the Arthur Conan Doyle stories with a texting, gadget-happy Sherlock (Benedict Cumberbatch) and a lovable Dr. Watson who blogs instead of writing penny dreadfuls, played by Martin Freeman who is making a career out of being literary characters (Arthur Dent and Bilbo Baggins). It's incredible. It's funny and exciting and well filmed and paced and doesn't have any anti-Mormon sentiments. Sherlock is actually likable and more than the flat character he was in the books, and the dynamic between Cumberbatch and Freeman is so natural that you actually understand why they put up with each other. Sometimes available on PBS under the "Masterpiece" series, but just do yourself and BBC a favour and buy it through Amazon. 

Next on my list after I finish the Tudors and True Blood may be the UK Office. I'm not sure as my Ricky Gervais tolerance is dangerously low. Sorry about any grammatical errors and a reminder to Brooke that she needs to come up to Seattle and remind me where those stupid commas are supposed to go.