How TV rules my life

Okay, not in that way, though I will admit I watch more TV than I should, mostly because I'm bored at home with two kids that are either in school or don't want me to play with them.

Now, that Downton Abbey has safely passed the episode (spoilers, sweetie!) where Mrs. Hughes finds out that she doesn't have cancer. I watch the show when it's released (any tech savvy person can if you can figure out how to either route your IP or install an extension like Hola.) The really eerie thing was the exact week that this originally aired was the exact week I was also having a breast cancer scare. And the day episode 3 rolled around was the day before I got the news I did not have cancer. Spooky.

Likewise, the week I had Liam tested for autism was the same week that annoying kid from Parenthood was diagnosed. Weirdly eerie? Yes. Coincidence. Of course it was.

I'm on the search for some new TV shows to watch. There are a few that I've tried to watch lately that I just really couldn't get into. Community was one of them. I @$*#ing hate the main character. I also tried Chuck. Sort of okay. I watched 2 seasons of Parks and Rec last Sunday when I was laid up with the flu and burned myself out. Any suggestions?

Wish me luck this week. The kids are on school break and I have a liver biopsy on Wednesday.

Happy Valentines Day

I have boob puss. Happy Valentines Day!

Fever and Ague

Today has been spent in bed, with a fever, shakes and general grossness. The funny thing is that yesterday morning I felt fine. Two hours later, I was so tired and sore and made Justin come with me on my errands. Apparently I'm not very bright because it took until this afternoon before I realized that I was sick. The sucky thing is that I can't take any medicine because I have to stay off of anything with blood thinners (i.e. aspirin) in case I need to get a liver biopsy.

So I'm a bad Asian today because my house is messy and I refuse to get out of bed to cook. So Lunar New Year stuff will have to wait until later in the week when I feel better. Maybe I'll post my mandu (potsticker) recipe.

Emotional Gulag

I read this article on Saturday, cried for an hour, and have been haunted ever since.

Sleep is for the weak!

It's currently 6 am PST. I've been awake for three hours. Yesterday, I woke up at four. The night before that, I was up at 2:30. Stupid prednisone. I haven't slept more than five hours straight for months. I even went to bed at 9:30 last night. I didn't fall asleep at 9:30 because, unfortunately, my phone gets the internet. Even still I think I was asleep within an hour.

I think I did fairly well this week. The kids are still alive. I managed to keep up with the laundry and dishes. The house isn't too much of a wreck.

The appointment with the GI doctor went fairly well. He thinks that it's just something called "fatty liver", which totally makes sense because 1) I'm fat and 2) I've gained something like 30 lbs in the past year. I have an ultrasound scheduled for Monday and he ran a bunch of blood tests to rule out other stuff like Wilson's disease. He also told me that I'm hepatitis B and C immune, which means at least a few of the vaccines I've gotten took. That's the good news. The bad news is that if I do end up on the methotraxate, I will have to get a liver biopsy done first to make sure that there isn't any fibrosis or even worse, cirrhosis. Yay. Chances are very low of either of those being a problem.

The other bad news is that Murgatroyd is hurting pretty badly. I'm in some pretty extreme discomfort, and weirdly the pain seems to be radiating to my upper back. Ugh. It's also really hard to lift weights at the gym when my very tender front makes me want to scream every time I brush up against something. JUST GET IT OVER WITH, BODY.

I need a new hobby. Any suggestions?

After thought: if none of this makes sense, remember I haven't slept since September.

Pray for my sanity

Justin left for a tech conference today and won't be back until Thursday. This weekend the kids decided to develop fevers. On Friday, I needed a refill for one of my meds so I called the doctor and the nurse demanded to know why I had cancelled the appointment that I originally had scheduled for this coming week. Ummm, because a month ago you guys called me and told me the doctor would be on vacation?!? She was going to give me the refill until she noticed the note from my rheumatologist about my liver panel being high and wanted me to come back in this week before she'll give me the refill. I already had an appointment for the GI tomorrow and the kids's speech therapy, so I had to schedule the appointment for Tuesday because that was last day before the doc's vacation. Hoping I get back in time to get Alana off the bus. ARGH. So the short of it:

I'm alone this week with two sick kids and a bunch of doctors appointments downtown and Murgatroyd is hurting like a MOTHER. Plus kindergarten registration starts tomorrow and I have to get that done sometime. Anyone want to be my PA until Thursday?

The fifth Doctor was Peter Davison

A week ago I noticed that the site of the granuloma had started to pucker and darken. According to Dr. Internet, this is a sign of cyst coming to the surface and possible rupture. I called the ARNP on Monday in a panic who got me into an appointment the next day. She was very nice, but informed me that this point, 1) it will likely rupture and there was pretty much nothing that she could do, 2) she didn't want to do artificially drain it because sometimes this can make it worse, 3) it will scar and there's nothing to do about that either and 4) it will be painful. When I asked her when I could expect it rupture, she gave me a timeline of about 3-4 days but could possibly take longer since it has been suppressed by the drugs. She also confirmed that there was a second granuloma. 

As I was walking out of the hospital, I got a call from the RN at the rheumatologist to inform me that I was not allowed to start on the methotrexate as my liver panel had come back elevated. This is quite the surprise since none of the drugs that I'm currently on should cause any stress on my liver. I asked the RN what that meant, at which point she said that she'd talk to the doctor to see if I was supposed to be referred to a "liver specialist." That makes the fifth doctor for those keeping count. She didn't call me back, of course. Damn nurse.

Fast forward almost a week. I accidentally thought Sunday morning was Monday and got very annoyed at the pediatrician's office not being open and accidentally made the on-call polyclinic doctor call me in a panic. I finally got a hold of the rheumatologist's office, got a referral for a gastro-enterologist (apparently that's what they meant by a "liver specialist"), and cancelled the appointment for this Wednesday since I wasn't going to be able to go onto the methotrexate. So I'm now in pain, still on drugs that I hate, and feeling very, very, very sorry for myself.

It's been a week since I was told the first granuloma would rupture and it still hasn't done anything, but I feel little pricks of pain all the time on top of the general constant ache. The prednisone has finally caught up with all the side effects, that initially came and went, and now seem to all have come at the same time. It leaves me tired, grumpy, hungry, sleep deprived, and paranoid, causing me to send weirdly passive-aggressive emails to people who don't deserve them. If you've gotten one, I sincerely apologize. I currently have what is known in professional circles as "the crazies."

I will say this about the health system up here in Seattle: it is very efficient. Barring receptionists that never seem to answer the phone and one nurse that forgot to call me back, most of the hold up of getting seen by a doctor has actually been my ability to arrange for childcare. Most specialists would have been able to schedule me for same day consults, and I've never had to schedule an appointment more than a week out. I joked to my sister-in-law that wasn't Obamacare supposed to be leaving us standing in line for healthcare? Also, since I initially went to a doctor that works within the Swedish Medical system, I never have to transfer my records from doctor to doctor as they stay in my electronic file, which is accessible by a central computer record. They can also see notes from other doctors, which prescriptions I've been given and referrals are given accordingly. Any lab work I'm supposed to do is simply ordered into the computer and I can go to any draw station without any work on my part (other than getting stabbed). After working at supposedly the "best" healthcare system in Utah, I can say I'm seriously impressed. This medical system is great and tons more efficient. 

On the plus side, I managed to get to ballet yesterday and the gym today. On the not so plus side, the prednisone has made me so hungry all the time that I've gained three pounds.